Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Do you want to be a crazy person?

No, Mom, I don't. I don't want to be crazy. I'm fucking sick of my brain betraying me; I'm sick of these psychosomatic ailments. I'm doing everything I can, but it's not going to be a quick fix--it wasn't last time, either. So I need you to cut me a little slack, please.

I am not either particularly strong or particularly stable, but what I am is fucking determined. I'm not going to let it beat me, but it's hard, and it's going to hurt, and I'm going to cry. That's how it works. I'm going to do my best to do it on my own, but sometimes I need a little encouragement. I don't need to be asked right away, Well, do you want to just quit school and come home? Do you want to be a crazy person?

Because, seriously. No one wants to be crazy. Especially not me.

3 comments:

The Substitute said...

Again, a little crazy isn't a bad thing ;)

Just breathe kiddo. Don't be a victim of it. If you need me I'm here.

Oh and panic doesn't make you crazy! Schizophrenia is crazy... panic disorders are just irrational

Em said...

XD

I love you, Mo. <3

Bekah said...

I agree! 'Sides, you can't be a writer and not be a little off (according to other people. Whose opinions don't count). You are writer. Embrace it! Well, as much as one can embrace the intangible ^^